Just Write

I did plan to work on The Coin has Two Faces this month…I got about 485 words and my brain said, ‘Nope, I wanna do Dungeons & Dragons’ so I said fine, let’s do this…and got about 3,280 words into that and my brain said ‘Nope don’t wanna after all’…and that is how we get to where I am now. I am about 24,629 words into a section of that story I mentioned I was working on with one of my best friends–so at least it’s writing (and I’m a bit under 10,000 words shy of my goal with 5 days left), but it’s not really something I planned on working on. However, when the muse decides it wants to do one thing–there’s nothing in this part of the multiverse that will derail them and sometimes you just have to go with it.

Sometimes people vilify stuff like fan fiction or writing that serves no other purpose than to just get some words on the paper, but the truth is there is a place for writing like that too. Sometimes shoving a lot of words on a page that make no sense clears the garbage from the gutters so that creativity starts flowing again. Other times it just adds in more garbage–but I’ve rarely found that writing just for the sake of putting pen to paper or fingers to keyboard doesn’t have some kind of benefit.

I, for one, see no shame in pouring your heart and soul into a fan fiction and then eventually turning it into an original story and getting it out there. Some of those fan fictions out there are really freaking amazing and sometimes the writers change names and circumstances and publish it to massive success (look up the origins of 50 Shades of Gray if you don’t believe me–I haven’t read it personally, but I do know a lot of people who have).

Will I ever do something like that? I’m not sure actually. I have written a lot of fan fiction in my day, some of it’s even made it onto the internet, but I don’t think any of it would actually work as a stand alone novel without the backbone of whatever fandom I wrote it for, well, except one, but that one’s too short to be a novel. Of course, my goal when I write fan fiction is to actually write it in such a way that if it were somehow dropped into the middle of the story/manga/animé it was written from it would fit in at least mostly seamlessly. I’m not generally one to write AUs (not that there’s anything wrong with an AU mind you–it’s just not usually my cup of tea, unless it’s a Reylo fan fiction, in that realm I eat up AUs because I hated the way canon turned out, but that’s something I won’t get into). I suppose, in a way, my Dungeons & Dragons story may kinda fall under that? I do kind of want to publish it or at least put it out to the masses–but we’ll see what happens. Though really, at its core, Shadows of Kurelinn is a fantasy novel masquerading as a homebrewed D & D Adventure with epic level characters and a whole lot of ‘Rule of Cool’ thrown in.

When it comes down to it, writing doesn’t necessarily have to be done with the end goal of selling it via a publishing company or KDP or self-publishing. It doesn’t even have to be written because you want to get 29189471892 Kudos and a hundred pages of comments on your preferred fan fiction site. It can be written because you wanted to write it. It doesn’t have to be published. It doesn’t have to be on a site. It doesn’t even have to be typed out (ye olde notebook and pen is peachy keen), but if you pull it out every now and then and reread it and it brings smile to your face (or spurs your creativity) then it has accomplished its purpose even though no eyes other than yours have seen it.

I probably would not call this a ‘productive’ Camp Nanowrimo as this story will likely be purely for mine and my best friend’s entertainment (aka it’s not publishable), but perhaps it’s a necessary Camp Nanowrimo. As a writer, I’ve come to realize that sometimes those words just don’t want to flow and sometimes you just have to write whatever gets you writing again.

Take a beloved character and write a story about them–it doesn’t have to have anything to do with their actual story.

Write some fan fiction.

Just go on a random freestyle ramble and see where the meandering words take you.

Just write.

♥ ~ Myriai

PS Maybe I’ll talk YT next month…

2020 was a crappy year, but…

A long time ago (during another rough stretch of time at least for me) I came up with the “ABC’s of Optimism” as a way to encourage myself out of the slump I was in. While some of those come off as borderline toxic positivity, I am still quite fond of the first rule:

“Admire the beauty around you even if it’s just the sparkly stuff in the sidewalk under your feet.”

Even though 2020 sucked and if it were a sidewalk it would be utterly demolished beyond repair, probably covered in mud and other detritus, sometimes you can still catch a little glimpse of the sparkle. That sparkle doesn’t change the fact the sidewalk is completely wrecked and can’t be fixed–just like 2020 can’t be made into something other than the complete train wreck, dumpster fire, or steaming pile that it was, but there are those moments of sparkle.

Did you read (or listen to) a good book this year? There’s a sparkle

Find a show you absolutely loved (or revisited an old favorite and found that you still adore it)? Sparkle.

Did you pick up a hobby or maybe start indulging in a hobby you forgot you enjoyed and found that it still is fun? Another sparkle.

The sparkles don’t add up to a diamond mine and it sure as hell doesn’t make 2020 sparkle, but those little sparkles are moments where for an instant there was a little bit of happy (even if it all faded to black in the next second) and it warms up for an instant.

For me, while I am going to remember that 2020 sucked balls, I’m also going to remember a few other things 

1) Chatting with Bubbles & Kikimmicoa on FB Messenger for long periods of time and giggling and enjoying their company

2) I finished a massive chunk of one of my books (and while it’s in rewrite stages and going to become three books, it was finally (mostly) finished).

3) I enjoyed the hell out of my Virtual Con Night that I had with my friends I usually go to conventions with when we decided to have a Zoom Meeting, eat one of our favorite con dishes, and get just a wee bit tipsy and talked for hours 

4) I have had a ton of fun exploring Dungeons and Dragons this year both and a player and especially a Dungeon Master. I have enjoyed playing Dungeons and Dragons with my family and starting to learn the ins and outs of the other side of the screen (and holy crap you DMs out there you freaking ROCK! I still have so much to learn).

5) I reconnected with an old friend from many, many years ago via Discord and it’s been fun talking with her on and off.

6) I had an enjoyable time doing some of the East Valley Nanowrimo community for the virtual Nanowrimo this year and had some fun conversations.

7) I have lost 25 lbs (give or take a couple pounds that I may or may not gain after indulging this weekend  ) and I am already feeling a lot better for it (even if I still have another 95 or so to go and it’s slow going).

8) I was reminded that I do really enjoy cooking and learning new recipes and making new favorites 

9) I’ve spent a lot more time with my niece and nephew this year (even in just the family setting around Dungeons & Dragons) and I’ve had a lot of fun seeing what kind of people they’re growing up into.

10) I still run super late timing wise (I sent out my August to November birthday cards just before Christmas >.> and I still need to do my actual Christmas cards ^^; ), but I’ve been working on sending out snail mail cards and letters to friends and family and the response I get from it is really fun.

11) I beat my first Final Fantasy game since Final Fantasy VIII (Final Fantasy VII Remake) and that was fun and I discovered Animal Crossing as well and that’s been fun to discover. I still have several games to play, but like everything in my life I tend to go in circles…I’ll do something for a while, go to something else, then eventually circle back around.

12) I also did some drawing this year even if it wasn’t a whole lot, it was more than I’ve done in the past couple years. I’m going to try and draw more next year 

So while those moments won’t make 2020 a stellar year for me, it does remind me that that there are sparkles in the sidewalk even if its completely wrecked